Freshly remodeled, the Game Tavern serves as your place to go to participate in roleplay or gaming threads with other members of the forum.

King of the Hill

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Sir Malifact » Fri May 14, 2010 5:12 am

The Angry Marine bursts out from underneath a pile of rubble at the base of the hill, gripping his powerbat in two hands and charging full-pace up the hill, letting loose a warcry of "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-" As he did. He did not relent; the roar never ceased to fly from his lips as he scaled the mountain, and when he'd finally reached the top, and jammed his pointer-finger at the beastie's forehead

"UUUUUUUCK YOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUU!!!" He screamed, the vibro-amplifiers of his helm hissing with static, before her brought his powerbat up in both hands and proceeded to turn the Graboid into a pile of gently-steaming wormflesh. In fact, he was so obsessed with smashing the pitiful thing, he forgot to claim the hill.

...like there was any doubt as to who owned it now.
Sir Malifact
Demon
 
Posts: 676
Joined: Thu Dec 03, 2009 12:20 am
Location: Throwing a party in the Fortress of Solitude...
Clan: Nal'sarkoth

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Phoenix0995 » Fri May 14, 2010 12:25 pm

... ooooooooookay, I think I may need backup on this one. *speaks into a walkie-talkie* Get me everything we've got at these coordinates, got it? "Yes, sir. Four seconds until transport."

Four seconds later, an army of mythical creatures, including five more types of firebird, beam in. I lead them in a charge against the Angry Marine. Many losses are taken, but eventually the Angry Marine dies, and... well...

My hill. Angry Space Marines trying to take it will be subject to attack by a large army of mythical beasts.
Phoenix0995
Summoner
 
Posts: 319
Joined: Sun Jan 31, 2010 9:55 pm
Location: Nowhere on any map... at least that you can find
Clan: Sarghress

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Ardent Abbadon » Mon May 31, 2010 12:28 pm

An ionic beam descends from the the sky, wiping away the mystical beasts with one hit. Moments later I stride up the calmly, a smirk on my face.

"And they said I wouldn't come back. My hill."
Ardent Abbadon
Tainted
 
Posts: 194
Joined: Wed May 05, 2010 5:00 am

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Zickman » Wed Jun 02, 2010 2:43 am

I bear down upon the hill with a band of intergalactic space bikers, all riding high power space cycles. We release a hail of bullets upon the hill. Once, twice, thrice. I particularly aim my fire at the squidheaded individual strutting around my hill like a turkey. After I make sure said squidface is dead I dismount from my bike and open a bear.
"This hill is now property of the Devil's Advocate!"
Zickman
Summoner
 
Posts: 379
Joined: Mon Apr 26, 2010 2:12 am
Location: Somewhere in the Ethereal Realm of Magic

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Ardent Abbadon » Wed Jun 02, 2010 3:57 am

I, reanimated from the dead(yet again), walk into Zick's bar, ignoring all the stares from the space bikers. Strutting up to the bar I demand to see the owner of the establishment. After beating around the bush for a minute I inform him he hasn't the Zoning permit to run a business here that can sell alcohol. A week later I laugh as bulldozers demolish Zickman's bar.

"My hill, lame-o!"
Ardent Abbadon
Tainted
 
Posts: 194
Joined: Wed May 05, 2010 5:00 am

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Zickman » Wed Jun 02, 2010 4:11 am

((So that's the way you want this to go down huh))

I walk over to a telephone boot which conveniently appears out of thin air. I call the Center for Animal control and report a loose raving mad probably rapid human/octopus/squid hybrid running around terrorizing everyone. Within minutes they respond and ole Ardent is forcibly captured, beaten fiercely, and forced into a cage. I wave at him as he is carted off to the space pound.
Zickman
Summoner
 
Posts: 379
Joined: Mon Apr 26, 2010 2:12 am
Location: Somewhere in the Ethereal Realm of Magic

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Ardent Abbadon » Wed Jun 02, 2010 5:02 am

I spent years in space pound. Pfff, more like space prison.

They treated me like an animal and that's what I became. The rooms were unsanitary. The cots stiff. The space food inedible. The inmates killed each other. And, yes, the space sodomy. I can never forget about the space sodomy. By the space dogs. In short the place was space Hell.

I almost lost myself completely in there. Almost let the lifestyle consume me. Bet then I met a space women; she soon became my space girlfriend. Getting out to be with space her became my only goal. So I studied space law. Sent letters to the space governor. Got some hot space *censored* from my space girlfriend. Eventually I got the chance to defend myself in space court. Before a jury of my space peers I preached my story of the injustices illithids face in everyday society. And in return I got my space freedom.

Since then I've proposed to my space girlfriend, who is now space pregnant with my space child. Space Lifetime is considering making a space movie about my incarceration. I've published my space book Mein Space Kampf. And last space week I even returned to the hill where I had been wrongfully arrested. I bought the hill and have begun work on an orphanage for space orphans.

On an unrelated note Zickman died a month before I was released from space pound. He died from a combination of space aids and anal space cancer. No one attended his space funeral or even mourned for him; hell, I even laughed about it. He got what was coming!

This has been the space story of my space struggle. I hope you space enjoyed it.











SPHESS!!!
Last edited by Ardent Abbadon on Sat Jun 12, 2010 2:42 am, edited 1 time in total.
Ardent Abbadon
Tainted
 
Posts: 194
Joined: Wed May 05, 2010 5:00 am

Re: King of the Hill

Postby The Watcher » Wed Jun 02, 2010 4:09 pm

Right, that's it, Thread Over. I think Ardent just won this hands down.
User avatar
The Watcher
Summoner
 
Posts: 331
Joined: Sun Jun 28, 2009 2:58 am
Location: Resident Angry Dvergar

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Phoenix0995 » Wed Jun 02, 2010 4:41 pm

Nonsense. I have cargo transporters I can use to move the orphanage. In fact, I can get one built even faster than Ardent can... about a mile away from the hill.

*walks up to Ardent* Excuse me, sir, your orphanage has been completed. It's about a mile that way.

A transporter beams Ardent to the location, and I walk back to the hill. I decide to leave the uncompleted orphanage (the one that Ardent was building, not the one where I just had him transported) there.

My hill, even if I have to do what I did in the Ban Game.
Phoenix0995
Summoner
 
Posts: 319
Joined: Sun Jan 31, 2010 9:55 pm
Location: Nowhere on any map... at least that you can find
Clan: Sarghress

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Ardent Abbadon » Wed Jun 02, 2010 5:41 pm

No. Just no.

I give you an epic and dramatic tale in my last post, and all you have is "i beamz you awayz; rofllamo!" No, I'm not letting this happen. My last post featured space sodomy for Gods sake! Watcher even said I won!

Let's try this then: Phoenix, come back when you're firing something with a little more punch. 'Cause this is the Big Leagues now and it's gonna take more then beams to knock me down. And that's why the will is still mine! :P
Ardent Abbadon
Tainted
 
Posts: 194
Joined: Wed May 05, 2010 5:00 am

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Zickman » Wed Jun 02, 2010 11:59 pm

After being away for several years running from the law, I finally return to my hill expecting to see my bar flourishing and my bikers greeting me with rowdiness and plenty of beer. Instead I find a halfcompleted orphanage, no bikers and no beer, a fucking illithid settlement, and even worst posters and statues of the goddamn squid face bastard I had disposed of a hundred times. And if that's not enough I find that papers are reporting my death as a result of aids and anal cancer. I quickly get on the phone and within the hour the most formidable enemy known to man arrive upon the scene: Dum, dum, dum.........

A troop of devious, conniving, highly overpaid lawyers. I sue the tentacles off of squid face. Taking possession of everything he has ever own and turning him out on the street with nothing but the clothes on his back. Now I am once again in possession of the hill, MY hill, where I have successful sugar plantation all thanks to the labor of a bunch of half breed illithid children. I'm making a killing and last I heard squidface latest career was dumpster diving. I can't be happier on MY hill.
Zickman
Summoner
 
Posts: 379
Joined: Mon Apr 26, 2010 2:12 am
Location: Somewhere in the Ethereal Realm of Magic

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Ardent Abbadon » Thu Jun 03, 2010 1:29 am

I return upon horseback, my face shrouded by dark hood. Through the sugar plantations I ride, observing the plight of my decedents. It moves me.

The next day I rally my kindred to rebel. An easy task after promising justice and passing out copies of Mein Space Kampf. We om nom nom on any of the forces supporting Zickman and storm his lair. We then kill the now obese Zickman(from becoming successful and lazy) and take everything that was his. From that point on the hill has been mine and my kin's.

*wee*
Ardent Abbadon
Tainted
 
Posts: 194
Joined: Wed May 05, 2010 5:00 am

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Phoenix0995 » Thu Jun 03, 2010 10:05 pm

Ardent Abbadon wrote:No. Just no.

I give you an epic and dramatic tale in my last post, and all you have is "i beamz you awayz; rofllamo!" No, I'm not letting this happen. My last post featured space sodomy for Gods sake! Watcher even said I won!

Let's try this then: Phoenix, come back when you're firing something with a little more punch. 'Cause this is the Big Leagues now and it's gonna take more then beams to knock me down. And that's why the will is still mine! :P


All right. I admit, I sort of deserved that. But that's not going to stop me from trying to get the hill back.

Organized crime really isn't my thing. I've been on the run from certain syndicates ever since a few months following the OOC debacle with Ardent Abbadon, for things that were clearly not my fault. I mean, how could I have predicted that rewiring the cloaking device in that particular way would accidentally cause that safe house to blow up? Or that a sniper would kill my partner on that thieving mission and blow my cover in such a way that my superiors thought I was the culprit? Idiots. Can't understand that those incidents (and several others) were complete accidents.

But today, I get my revenge on them. My fleet has gotten larger over the years. I now possess stolen technology from some of the most advanced races in the galaxy, including weapons, shielding, propulsion, targeting, cloaking, and space manipulation tech. Five ships versus five powerful crime syndicates... but that's all I need. More than I need, in fact. It'll be like five battles of Wolf 359, but the people with more ships will actually lose. No survivors. No extra ships that my fleet will have missed.

It will all end today.

In orbit around a planet far from all the five star systems where my five ships fight, a scout ship's phasers slice through the atmosphere... straight down toward the hill. Everything on the hill dies. A few men beam down and plant a flag there, then wait.

"Sir, all of the syndicates have been destroyed... wait a minute. Long range sensors are picking up a ship matching a scout configuration. It seems to belong to the Black Hand, the rest of which we just destroyed."

I say, from the conn of my flagship, "Take us there and send the other four ships instructions to rendezvous on the way."

"Yes, sir. Plotting course and engaging warp drive... now."

A few hours later, my fleet warps in-system and destroys the scout, then phasers the hill (for the second time that day) and beams me and several ground troops down. I plant my flag on the hill.

If you ignore my fleet, my fleet will ignore you. My friggin' hill.
Phoenix0995
Summoner
 
Posts: 319
Joined: Sun Jan 31, 2010 9:55 pm
Location: Nowhere on any map... at least that you can find
Clan: Sarghress

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Sir Malifact » Wed Jun 09, 2010 8:06 am

I'm fuckin' angry now.

These heretical cocksockets think they can come in here, with their mopey little sob-stories and their flashy lazaars. Think they can just waltz on in and take MY hill. Think that frickin' unicorns 'n magical beasties can keep me down.

Bitches got another thing coming. You can't kill an Angry Marine; we're just too damn angry. Death tries to take us, we punch it in the nuts and make it our bitch, screw that bag 'o bones so hard it won't sit straight for a month. Then we come back, and we finish what we started.

We're the fucking Angry Marines.

Always Angry. All the time.

NOW ENOUGH WITH THIS FUCKING MONOLOGUE SHIT. TIME TO GET CEREAL.

Over the horizon, an impossible large shape lumbers towards the hill. Hundreds of feet tall, it is shaped roughly like a man, but made out of metal, an obscene amount of armaments jutting forth from the Titan's frame. One arm was a massive Chainsword, each tooth of the blade actually another, seperate chainsword, with a second, unnessesary chainsword underslung beneath the main one. On each shoulder was perched an entire missile silo, along with hundreds of slots that, when activated, would send a barrage of Angry-Marines and Land-Raiders at the enemy. It's colorshcemes were yellow and red, and smeared about it's frame were frowning faces and obscene insults.

It was the Angry Titan. And it meant buisness. Slowly, the massive Rocket-fist was lowered to face the hill, the middle finger rising upwards; a last FUCK YOU before the finger shot off from the hand with a BOOM, the miniature nuclear missile zipping towards the hill.

There was a boom. And all was quiet.


"MY HILL NOW, FAGSICLES"



(>.O Yeah yeah, shittastic, I know, but it's 4 in the morning over here. For a more accurate depiction of the ANGRY TITAN, take a looksie here

http://fc03.deviantart.net/fs41/f/2009/ ... nadene.jpg)
Sir Malifact
Demon
 
Posts: 676
Joined: Thu Dec 03, 2009 12:20 am
Location: Throwing a party in the Fortress of Solitude...
Clan: Nal'sarkoth

Re: King of the Hill

Postby Ardent Abbadon » Thu Jun 10, 2010 6:45 am

But as the Angry Marines take infuriated joy at their victory, none noticed the rip in the Warp behind them. They also didn't see the Emperor-class Chaos Titan step for from it. So it makes sense they didn't see the Titan unleash rounds from both its Volcun Melt-Gun and massive Storm Bolter into the Angry Titan's back. And again. And again. And then stomp it for good measure. Meanwhile, inside the Chaos Titan, Pricep Abbadon the Ardent smirked.

"This hill belongs to Ardent Abbadon and his Master and God of Change, Obama! I'm back baby!"
Ardent Abbadon
Tainted
 
Posts: 194
Joined: Wed May 05, 2010 5:00 am

PreviousNext

Return to Game Tavern

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest